Thursday, January 13, 2005

Dear Diary Thursday...

Mood....humble and not so good.

My neighbor passed away yesterday....wonderful elderly man who was 88 and has just been a great guy. His wife has been a friend of our family since I was about 8 so I feel really sad that he passed, even though he is now out of pain and misery. I will be going to the viewing tomorrow night, and I am sure you know how much fun I find those since I don't handle death very well.

Dylan and I went to his mom's house last night for dinner and had a great time. She is always so much fun to hang out with...kind of like being with a person your own age, just more wise.

Bad mood again today...I just can't seem to shake it. I think some of it comes from the fact that I feel very unappreciated and disrespected. I make an effort to be courteous and respectful to those in my life that mean the most to me, in and out of work. However, often times those people that mean the most to you always seem to take you for granted, like a shrub in your yard or an appliance in your house. I guess I am just tired of trying to fight for the respect and have just thrown my hands in the air. To those in my life that don't give me the respect that I give to them, I just need to stop it. I don't need the respect to continue my life, to breath just is appreciated. Sometimes you just need to look at reality for what it is, take a deep breath, and move on.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Dear Diary Wednesday...

Mood...not so good.

I woke up in just a terrible mood and I am not sure why. I have a headache but I can't attribute my pissiness to that. I think after the stress I have been having at work lately, and not even due to work related issues but just people that piss me off in general, I have given myself the start of a migraine.

Last night I got home to a leak in my gas fireplace pipe. I had just the tiniest bit of water coming down from the roof and thankfully, it is not effecting the ceiling of our home or the walls. When it is warmer I will just have to get up on the roof and put on a new seal and all will be well. I found it a blessing that with all the rain we have had the last few days that the leak was the size of a quarter. Plus, it gave me the opportunity to open up the pipe and it's pieces and clean it!!

After that event I went and did a bit of shopping and paid my dues at the gym for the next year. And then I just came home and relaxed. It was nice to be able to read and do some studying and relax with no interruptions.

Tonight Dylan and I are going over to his mom's for dinner, after I get home from the gym. I am hoping we are home at a reasonable hour so that I can get to bed early again....especially if I still have this headache.

The weekend is shaping up to be very quiet and low key and I am grateful for that. I am not planning anything other than taking my folks out to dinner on Sunday for their anniversary. I just want a weekend of relaxing, no running around, and I might not even get dressed on Saturday....just stay in my pj's all day....

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Dear Diary Tuesday, part deux.....


I know it has been awhile since I did this kind of list, but this shit is pissing me off today:

1. ALLOW another person to express their opinion. Believe it of fuckin' not, YOU might not know everything about everything. Maybe somebody else has some thought on a subject, maybe a little insight you don't have, and god forbid, they might even be right! Shut your fucking yap and let somebody else have their say even if you do not like what they are saying! You are not the only person on the planet who can be right about subjects!

2. Not every single situation on this planet will be solved BY GETTING AN ATTORNEY! People who automatically jump to the "I will get a lawyer!" or "I will sue!" attitude are pathetic. I actually overheard somebody today mentioning that if they ever fell in our parking lot, and did not even hurt themselves, JUST FELL, they would SUE!

3. If a situation does not effect you, does not effect your personal life, does not effect your job, do not stick your nose into it. I actually have somebody at work that THINKS a co-worker is having an affair and so that person is going to call the spouses!! There is no affair going on...nothing but a friendship....but this OUTSIDE PERSON WHO HAS NO FUCKING KNOWLEDGE AT ALL believes there is more to it. Get your FACTS before jumping into something!

Okay, I feel better now.....

Dear Diary Tuesday...

Mood....good again.

Have I mentioned lately how much of an adjustment it is to live with somebody, other than your family??? I have had to learn more patience with others, and mostly with myself. I have learned how to do more for myself and try to rely on others much less (which I did not think was possible since I am a very independent person anyways.) I have learned to cooperate with others more, which has been a bonus. And most importantly, I have learned to share a bad with another person AND all of our animals. Now you might snicker at that, but it is hard to share your bed with somebody else!! I don't do well with somebody's foot touching me, snoring, movement, or any type of noise coming from what was once an unoccupied space.

Some of the things that I miss now that I am living with Dylan....e-mails just to see how you are doing, telling you that they love you; phone calls every night just to sit and talk; the excitement of getting to see somebody once or twice a week because you don't see them the rest of the week; sharing really exciting news that the person didn't already know but they do know because they live with you; not having the person see you all the time with your hair not done and no make up; sexy e-mails or phone calls. I know that all seems trivial and petty, but it is little things that I miss. Now I am not saying I would give up everything that I have right now to go back to all of those little things, I am just wondering when, or if, those little things come back. I guess I just feel kind of stuck in a rut right now and not sure how to pull out of it. Oh well, tomorrow is a new day and this one is not over with yet......

Monday, January 10, 2005

Dear Diary Monday...


Wow, I have been a slacker about my blog!!

Wednesday I stayed home from work with a migraine and did nothing but sit in the dark pretty much all day. I did manage to make a pathetic dinner for Dylan and finish the laundry, but that was it.

Thursday....have no idea. went well and then the Netzlers and Dylan and I went to see Connie. All went well with her surgery and she looked wonderful.

Saturday Dylan and I spent the entire morning scrubbing the house down, then went to the store, then met the Poors to see "White Noise" and then we met up with the Netzler's to grab dinner and head back to our place to eat and watch "Napoleon Dynamite". "White Noise" was okay, not my favorite movie, but it does have Michael Keaton and that is always a bonus for me. "Napoleon Dynamite" was an awesome movie and anyone that grew up in the 80's should watch it.....brings back some scary memories. And honestly, weren't we all proficient with martial arts weapons back then???

Yesterday I made dinner, cleaned up the house a little more, managed to sneak in a nap, and just pretty much relaxed all day. It was a wonderful day spent doing this that I wanted to do and not having an agenda. I love Sunday's like that.