Dear Diary Saturday...

Work has been insane, but enjoyable, as sick as that sounds. I have pulled my hair out, thrown tantrums, screamed, said many,many cuss words, have gone home each and every night exhausted, thrown myself into bed, and fallen asleep with a smile on my face. I am back into my element, I have my energy back, I am balanced again, and I feel better. I think making it through Christmas with the pain of losing a close friend this year, feeling my energy draining each and every day, losing a small and beautiful creature, has forced me to become a stronger peson, and now I know why. The "Fates" were preparing me to be stronger to help others out that are in far more pain than I am. I'm back, and watch the fuck out!

Anyways, last night Dylan and I went to dinner, both in very foul moods and ended the evening in laughter and holding one another. It is almost frightening how we are so in tune with each other that we now need to be AROUND each other to rejuvenate our energies. Yucky, yucky love thing I guess!!

Have also come a new pact with myself...I don't NEED to have people in my life, even they may be friends a century old, who are always "all about themselves", butting themselves into where they are not wanted, can not allow me to have relationships without throwing themselves into the relationship as well, and bitching about my decision behind my back. That will no longer be allowed. I feel better for this decision. I have struggled, built, and hardened many relationships this year, new and old, and am very happy with a great deal of them. Case in point...new relationship with JJ that I could not be more thrilled about......old relationship with Jeffy that gets stronger and stronger every day. Both are rewarding and educational and, most importantly, revitalize my energy with every contact. I love those type of people. Those that do nothing but suck the life out of a room, regardless if I am there are not, will be removed. Yeah for me for having my balls back!!!!