Dear Diary Monday...
I had a really bad night last night. Had a whole bunch of things on my brain, bothering me psychologically and spiritually. Ended up not sleeping at all last night due to my stressing. Got up and went to work, keeping my tone quiet and introverted as I have decided that I am to "go to work, do my job, go home" no more, no less. Had a great phone call and e-mai letting me know that I was going to lunch with a special someone, not taking NO for an answer, so I met up with JJ at the La Puente for stimulating conversation, fun food, and FREAK OUT fantastic hair on the lovely lady!!! Oh, and her suit was SHARP! Anyways, I got a new perspective on the situation, made me feel a lot better, and I thank her for that. She has convinced me that I am not as horrible of a friend as I have been made to feel. That I should not change the fact that I am an open and honest (sometimes to blunt, but that is me) person who tries very hard to help everyone around her. She reminded me that I have a large scope of friends because of those, and several other qualities that she and Toni, pointed out to me today. I feel much better, but at the same time, very slighted by people who definatly do not know anything about me...and for that I am sad. I am the type of person who will attack those who hurt her friends, even if the "hurt friend" makes up with the attacker, not to understand why I attacked the person in the first place. I can have a rip roaring fight with somebody and still make up with them, call them my friend, trust them again...and I don't need to broadcast that across the entire nation. I am not vengeful, I am not mean, at least I try not to be. However, there are few people that view me as such, which is their right. However, not bringing your issues that you have WITH me TO ME is hurtful as it shows me that there is no trust, no faith, in what is our "friendship". Oh well, lessons learned and I am moving on.

Work was.....hell. The chic that had the roll over came in on time, was on the phone all morning, had to leave for an emergency ultrasound, got back at around 2:00, had a meeting with my boss and the Pit Boss, came out crying, grabbed her purse and left. What an OH SO PRODUCTIVE day for her. The reason for the tears? Because she cannot keep up the major project she was given, it has now cost us a client, they removed her from the project and gave it to somebody else....who actually has been doing the project for about 5 weeks now. If it were any other person, I would say the tears were because she felt so lousy about costing us a client.....however, having heard what she was telling ther people, the tears were because "they hurt her feelings because they made her feel like she couldn't handle the job.".......ummmm, wasn't she that PROVED she couldn't handle the job. Oh well, I will be as supportive as I can, bite my tongue, struggle through this with her. I think the Fates are trying to teach me compassion and patience this week.......keep your fingers crossed for me......